Acting Out of Fear: Breeching Confidence
Not long after my marriage, a close & very young family member confided in me about some things going on in her life. Even though I didn’t agree…she didn’t ask my opinion, so I kept it to myself. At the time, I felt the next best thing, would be to warn her about the risk and maybe even aid her in taking precautions. (to a certain degree)
I was 18, trying to still figure out what I wanted out of life, while the other part of my brain was trying to decide what’s for dinner. As the day went by after our visit, I became increasingly uncomfortable about the situation. The fact that one of her parents was aware of the happenings, made it even more eerie.
I was extremely aware that her father was not very active in her life, and thought it might be a good idea to give him a heads up. I was thinking along the lines that even though he had not been there, THIS would be the perfect opportunity to step up, to work towards being present. Not to go to his daughter or her mother condemning & pointing fingers…but that’s EXACTLY what he did. The young family member was hurt and furious. The mother, who never was a big fan of mine was… let’s just say, she wasn’t gitty. The mother also used this as an opportunity to form a wedge between myself and her daughter. Because of the father’s over & unnecessary reaction, I sometimes wish I would have kept it to myself.
I acted out of fear. Fear that the activities had the possibility to ruin her reputation and alter her life course negatively… permanently. I am now faced with a similar issue yet again. This time, with a young friend of our family. We have only known her for a couple of years. It’s not like the mom & I are really close. I know personally, I would want to be told. But everyone doesn’t feel the same. At this point, I just feel that I should only address it in prayer.
What would you do?
